: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
should my penis look like a turkey
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
