love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
