Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
