Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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