I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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