Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
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You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
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He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize