she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
