Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I want to be your penis for a week.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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