I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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