My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
did i just pee glitter
Randomize
