when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize