If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
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The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I have aggressive nipples.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
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I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Panties = found
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