I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize