Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize