ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
