have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
zippers are such a cool invention
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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