awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
