don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize