I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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