I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
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so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
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The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.