Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Are you dead

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  Yes

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Oh man

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): Are you dead (1-260): Yes (260): Oh man (1-260): Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard http://tfl.nu/iien
  Replies (7) Good night (3012) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever http://tfl.nu/se2n
  Replies (47) Good night (6801) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name. http://tfl.nu/s3qy
  Replies (52) Good night (17262) Bad night (1239)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex? http://tfl.nu/y75a
  Replies (15) Good night (856) Bad night (4400)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her http://tfl.nu/ofex
  Replies (65) Good night (13776) Bad night (2685)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick. http://tfl.nu/o2a1
  Replies (4) Good night (834) Bad night (3668)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree. http://tfl.nu/fej1
  Replies (15) Good night (3374) Bad night (1358)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking. http://tfl.nu/jhua
  Replies (4) Good night (801) Bad night (1802)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake. http://tfl.nu/1ph6
  Replies (6) Good night (933) Bad night (2177)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right? http://tfl.nu/ddd7
  Replies (10) Good night (1106) Bad night (2165)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this" http://tfl.nu/ckz0
  Replies (6) Good night (1194) Bad night (1836)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt http://tfl.nu/h1u7
  Replies (9) Good night (638) Bad night (2509)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future http://tfl.nu/c1z9
  Replies (1) Good night (973) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med. http://tfl.nu/j1ow
  Replies (1) Good night (583) Bad night (232)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god. http://tfl.nu/ma7j
  Replies (0) Good night (145) Bad night (332)

Randomize