drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence