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• (231): View more from Michigan

  i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.

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• (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..

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• (807): View more from Ontario

  If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right

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  These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Who is this?

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Did it work?

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good

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