since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize