can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
