I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize
