Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
