we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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