ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
