Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
