k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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