wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
