she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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