shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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