I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize