You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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