i just google imaged poop.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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