I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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