Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize