Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize