told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
