Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
