I think I died a long time ago.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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