Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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