you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
soo... how was my night?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize