just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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