I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
being pregnant is like rehab
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
