Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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