White coat. Heels.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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