Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
