oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
