My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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