Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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