you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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