Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
