you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize